Monday, December 10, 2012
- Avoid Alliteration. Always.
- Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
- Avoid cliches like the plague. (They’re old hat.)
- Employ the vernacular.
- Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
- Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
- It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
- Contractions aren’t necessary.
- Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
- One should never generalize.
- Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
- Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
- Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
- Profanity sucks.
- Be more or less specific.
- Understatement is always best.
- Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
- One word sentences? Eliminate.
- Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
- The passive voice is to be avoided.
- Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
- Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
- Who needs rhetorical questions?
- Parenthetical words however must be enclosed in commas.
- It behooves you to avoid archaic expressions.
- Avoid archaeic spellings too.
- Don't repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
- Don't use commas, that, are not, necessary.
- Do not use hyperbole; not one in a million can do it effectively.
- Never use a big word when a diminutive alternative would suffice.
- Subject and verb always has to agree.
- Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.
- Use youre spell chekker to avoid mispeling and to catch typograhpical errers.
- Don't repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
- Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
- Don't never use no double negatives.
- Poofread carefully to see if you any words out.
- Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
- Eschew obfuscation.
- No sentence fragments.
- Don't indulge in sesquipedalian lexicological constructions.
- A writer must not shift your point of view.
- Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
- Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
- Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
- If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
- Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
- Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
- Always pick on the correct idiom.
- The adverb always follows the verb.
- Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
- If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be by rereading and editing.
- And always be sure to finish what
Friday, November 30, 2012
Cook time: 30 min
Total time: 1 hour 5 mins
1 sweet potato
3 eggs, whisked
¼ cup Gold Label Virgin Coconut Oil, melted
⅓ cup raw honey
½ cup Enjoy Life Chocolate Chips
3 tablespoons Coconut Flour
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
¼ teaspoon baking powder
¼ teaspoon vanilla extract
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
pinch of salt
Time to bake that sweet potato. Preheat your oven to 425 degrees, use a fork to puncture holes all around it, then throw in the oven for 25-30 minutes. (I’m sure you could microwave it, but I like the ole fashioned way. I’m just so ole fashioned)
Once your sweet potato is soft and cooked through, peel off the skin and mash it up in a bowl. And turn your oven down to 350 degrees.
Now add your wet ingredients: coconut oil, honey, vanilla, and whisked eggs to the bowl and mix together.
Then add your dry ingredients: coconut flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, cinnamon, salt and chocolate chips.
Mix well to incorporate all that goodness.
Pour into an 8×8 glass baking dish
Bake for 30-35 minutes.
Let rest to cool a bit.
Eat those b*tches. Try not to eat them all in one sitting. Like what may have happened in my kitchen….oops.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Turkey, Mushroom, and Potato Soup | Never Enough Thyme - Recipes and food photographs with a slight southern accent.:
Cheddar sausage buttermilk biscuits - Snixy Kitchen:
Peppermint Crinkle Cookies | Bakers Royale:
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Active Time: 20 Minutes
Total Time: 5 Hours 35 Minutes
Yield: Makes 8 servings
If you like the deep, rich taste of brown sugar, use dark brown sugar in this recipe; otherwise, prepare it with light brown sugar for a lighter color and flavor.
Fully Baked Pastry Shell
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/8 teaspoon salt
3 beaten egg yolks
1 1/2 cups milk
2 tablespoons margarine or butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
3 egg whites
1/4 teaspoon cream of tartar
6 tablespoons sugar
FOR FILLING: Prepare and fully bake pastry shell as directed; set aside to cool. In a heavy, medium saucepan stir together the brown sugar, flour, and salt. Add egg yolks and milk. Cook while stirring with a wire whisk till thickened and bubbly. (Mixture may appear curdled. Stir briskly while cooking and mixture will become smooth.) Cook and stir 2 minutes more. Remove from heat. Stir in margarine or butter and vanilla. Pour hot filling into baked pastry shell.
FOR MERINGUE: In a mixing bowl beat egg whites and cream of tartar with an electric mixer on medium speed about 1 minute, or till soft peaks form (tips curl). Gradually add sugar, 1 tablespoon at a time, beating on high speed about 4 minutes more, or till mixture forms stiff, glossy peaks (tips stand straight) and sugar completely dissolves. Immediately spread meringue over hot filling, spreading to edge of pastry to seal and prevent shrinkage.
Bake pie in a preheated 350 degrees oven for 15 minutes. Cool on a rack for 1 hour. Chill 3-6 hours before serving. Store in the refrigerator.
Recipe reprinted by permission of Weldon Owen. All rights reserved.
Monday, November 5, 2012
Though I absolutely love dessert, I have a few stipulations these days when it comes to what I eat.
First of all, it has to be as unprocessed as possible (duh).
Second, it has to be free of white sugar and as healthy as possible.
And lastly: It must be easy.
And, let me tell you, it doesn't get any easier than this.
This recipe has five ingredients, uses a single bowl, takes about 90 seconds to make and doesn't require a single kitchen appliance save for your freezer. (Yes, no mixer, food processor, blender, oven or microwave.)
I'm sure I don't have to tell you at all why this is fantastic. But what I will tell you is that it gets even better: These taste amazing.
Don't believe me? Make them. I dare you not to eat a quarter of the dough before they even make it to the freezer. I mean, just look at the chocolatey-nutty-oaty goodness:
Way-Too-Easy Unprocessed Chocolate Chip Oat Bars
1 cup thick-cut oats
1/2 cup nut butter (peanut butter, almond butter, cashew butter, sun butter, etc.)
1/4 cup maple syrup
1/4 to 1/2 cup chocolate chips (I used Enjoy Life mini-chocolate chips)
Mix all ingredients in a bowl, using a wooden spoon or spatula. Next, line a 7x11 glass pan (or whatever pan you have that's closest in size) with wax paper or parchment. Dump your dough out onto the lined pan.
Next, take another sheet of wax or parchment paper, layer it on top of the dough and use firm pressure from your hands to flatten it smooth.
Remove the paper and score the flattened dough into small squares or rectangles. Replace the top layer of paper and stick the whole thing into the freezer for 20 minutes or as long as you can stand it.
Serve them straight from the freezer (they tend to fall apart if left out). Store them in the freezer, too, either in the pan, or in Tupperware between layers of paper.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Princess Bride Ipsum Generator
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Friday, September 7, 2012
Over the years I have tried numerous methods of extermination.
I have tried fly-tape placed in inconspicuous places around the home (it is rather ugly). The flies do eventually stick to it which can be rather disturbing when they are still alive. But there still always seems to a few who seem to escape the sticky paper. Perhaps they are among the smarter flies (is it possible?)
I have tried the old fashioned fly swatter but that creates an awful mess and can be downright dangerous and gross sometimes. Flies seem to have a habit of landing on something that can't be hit with a long metal rod.
I have even used the kids nerf and air-soft guns, which can be fun, but is also a bit on the dangerous side. Not to mention it puts little dents in walls and woodwork and can be really scary if the kids get involved.
The one things that disturbs me even more is the uncanny ability flies have to be able to adjust their numbers based on the current fly population in the house. There never seems to be more than 2-3 flies at one time. Any more would cause me to get angry and start a killing spree. And besides, it doesn't matter how many I actually kill, there are always 2-3 flies in the house. I have hunted them all over the house and killed every last one. But just moments later, some how, another one appears. However, if I stop the violence and refrain from killing, the number never goes beyond 2-3. Logic tells me that if I stop killing them, eventually, there would be hundreds or thousands of flies. But alas, this doesn't happen. Somehow, they just know and manage to limit their numbers to just a couple.
Lately I have learned to accept my hatred for the dreaded winged insects. I hold back when they seem to taunt me by flying past when I'm making a meal. I resist the urge to crush them against the screen when they circle my head while I'm working. I simply turn on some soothing music and mask the buzz and think of how they are all people in previous lives, mean and nasty people, but people anyway =) If it gets really bad, I hunt them down and let them go outside. I'm sure they just get back in the line and eventually end up inside but it makes me feel better. Perhaps I can start some kind of fly-tagging research. Nanotechnology at it's finest!
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Thursday, June 7, 2012
10 Only In Kansas Accommodations (PHOTOS)
I can already sense the sneers and rolling eyebrows from the traveling naysayers when I express my admiration for Kansas, but I refuse to buy into any of that. While traveling this patch of North American for a segment of The 30 Postcards Project, ...
Friday, May 18, 2012
The secret to the sparkling flavor of these delicately crumbed muffins is the strips of lemon zest finely ground into the sugar. Enjoy the muffins warm right from the oven.
Make Ahead Tip: Wrap each in plastic and freeze in a freezer bag for up to 1 month. To reheat, remove plastic, wrap muffin in a paper towel and microwave on High for 30 to 60 seconds.
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup nonfat buttermilk (see Tip)
1/3 cup canola oil
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup white whole-wheat flour or whole-wheat pastry flour (see Shopping Tip)
1 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups fresh or frozen (not thawed) raspberries
TIP: No buttermilk? Mix 1 tablespoon lemon juice into 1 cup milk.
Shopping Tip: White whole-wheat flour, made from a special variety of white wheat, is light in color and flavor but has the same nutritional properties as regular whole wheat. Whole-wheat pastry flour can be used as a substitute here. Both can be found in the natural-foods section of the supermarket or online.
MAKE AHEAD TIP: Wrap each in plastic and freeze in a freezer bag for up to 1 month. To reheat, remove plastic, wrap muffin in a paper towel and microwave on High for 30 to 60 seconds.
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
Coat 12 large (1/2-cup) muffin cups with cooking spray or line with paper liners.
Use a vegetable peeler to remove the zest from the lemon in long strips. Combine the zest and sugar in a food processor; pulse until the zest is very finely chopped into the sugar. Add buttermilk, oil, egg and vanilla and pulse until blended.
Combine whole-wheat flour, all-purpose flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt in a large bowl. Add the buttermilk mixture and fold until almost blended. Gently fold in raspberries. Divide the batter among the muffin cups.
Bake the muffins until the edges and tops are golden, 20 to 25 minutes. Let cool in the pan for 5 minutes before turning out onto a wire rack. Serve warm.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
|Crickets have been kept as pets for thousands of years, especially in Japan and China, because, as God would have it, the males rub their grooved ridges on the underside of one of their front wings against the sharp edge of their other front wing, producing a chirping that's found by many to be a lovely sound. |
If you want to keep a cricket as a pet, first you have to get one. Most garden variety crickets that you could catch yourself will do the trick: in North America the Acheta assimilis species will be the most commonly found in the wild. The "house cricket" (Acheta domesticus) and the "field cricket" (Gryllus bimaculatus) are also good for singing -- the latter having the prettier song, the former being the type most commonly sold in pet stores or bait shops.
Whatever the species, you want a boy cricket for the tunes. A girl cricket will have an ovipositor to lay her eggs with. It will look sort of like a tail or a phallus, and will be almost as long as her body. In other words, when you see a female cricket, you'd probably guess her as a male because of the appendage, so reverse your expectations.
A place for him to lay his weary cricket head
An aquarium with a fine wire mesh lid will work. So would a jar, but be a hero and give him some Lebensraum. Put some sand, a few rocks and twigs in there so he'll be cozy and have a few hidey-holes to relax in. Though he can be kept at room temperature, he will be more active and sing more if kept on the warm side -- between 80 and 90 degrees Fahrenheit. Keeping him near a small lamp might make him happy, but do keep him out of direct sunlight. Ideally, there should be about 16 hours of light to 8 hours of darkness for most kinds of crickets.
Keep a damp sponge or moistened cotton wool in his cage to serve as a drinking water source. Be careful about leaving any standing water in their cages as they have very tiny brains, are not very bright, and can drown very easily in even the shallowest of water. If you want to leave a container of water with him, put some marbles or rocks in with the water so he can drink it without standing in it or possibly falling into it. Another option is to use the same type of water dispenser that baby chicks use, filling the bowl with marbles or rocks.
Despite their preference for Greek food, crickets will eat anything. They are omnivorous (though in the wild some species are carnivorous by choice) and they will even eat each other if they are hungry enough. That last is too ugly to think about and even uglier to witness, so feed them well with small bits of carrot, potato, lettuce, apple, other fruits and vegetables and their peelings (no citrus), rolled oats, pieces of bread, and/or ground up dried dog food. Remove uneaten food so it won't rot. If you want to highly please him, you can get actual "cricket chow" from bait shops and cricket breeders. Even if you use true "cricket chow," throw him a piece of fruit now and again to keep him happy.
Like, most any other red-blooded, American bug, Mr. Cricket may wish to marry. After he becomes one with his beloved, she will want to lay her eggs on something damp. Once a female lays her eggs, remove the eggs and place them in a separate container containing moist soil. Keep the soil and environment of the egg container moist (but not so moist that the hatchlings drown; their brains are even tinier than those of their parents), misting it with water daily. The eggs should hatch in about three weeks (when exactly depends on the temperature), and the babies ("nymphs") will be very small and white.
Crickets are also known as the "poor man's thermometer." You can determine the exact temperature by counting the number of chirps a cricket makes during a 15-second interval, then adding 37 to the number to get the correct temperature in degrees Fahrenheit. If he chirps 40 times in 15 seconds, the temperature is precisely 77 degrees where the cricket is sitting.
Virtual diving: underwater panoramas of the Great Barrier Reef - in pictures | Environment | guardian.co.uk
'via Blog this'
Monday, February 20, 2012
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups buttermilk
2 cups sour cream
2 large eggs
4 teaspoons vanilla extract
3 tablespoons unsalted butter
Additional unsalted butter
Pure maple syrup, warm
Melt 1/2 tablespoon butter on griddle over medium heat. Pour batter by 1/3 cupfuls onto griddle, spacing 2 inches apart. Cook until bubbles break on surface, about 3 minutes. Turn pancakes over. Cook until bottoms are golden, 3 minutes. Transfer to plates. Repeat with remaining batter, adding butter to skillet as needed.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Sweet Potato Muffins
2 1/2 cups whole-wheat flour (preferably pastry flour)
3/4 cup sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup melted unsalted butter
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 cup pureed or mashed cooked sweet potato
1 egg, beaten
1/2 cup buttermilk
Heat oven to 375° F. Grease 12 muffin cups or add paper liners.
Combine flour, sugar, baking powder, ginger, baking soda, and salt.
In a bowl, whisk butter, oil, sweet potato, egg, and buttermilk. Fold wet mixture into the dry; stir until just combined.
Fill muffin cups three-quarters full. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes.
Banana Nut Variation Reduce sugar to 1/2 cup. Replace sweet potato with 1 cup mashed, very ripe banana; add 1/2 cup chopped walnuts to the batter.
Pumpkin Coconut Variation Replace sweet potato with 1 cup canned pumpkin; add 1/2 cup shredded, unsweetened coconut to the batter.
CALORIES PER MUFFIN: 248
CARBS: 37 G
FIBER: 3 G
PROTEIN: 4 G
FAT: 9 G
MARK BITTMAN may not be sure which marathon he's running next (he'll either tackle November's Philadelphia Marathon or December's Palm Beaches Marathon Festival), but he is sure about one thing: his training. "I'm doing a long run, speedwork, and tempo run every week," says Bittman, author of The Food Matters Cookbook. "And I'm following hard weeks with easier ones." For more, go to markbittman.com.